Let’s take a moment to reflect today. What are your financial goals? What are your life goals? Almost always, there is overlap between them, and that overlap usually is happiness. What is happiness for you?

A partner whom you love and who loves you? Children who are happy and healthy, who are able to pursue their goals in life, and who love and are loved?

Enough money to buy and do what you want whenever you want it?

A debt-free life?

Whatever goals you’ve identified for yourself, do you have a realistic action plan to achieve your goals?

(As tempting as they are to imagine, winning the lottery, inheriting money from unknown sources, inventing some unidentified do-hickey that everyone will buy, being discovered somewhere unexpectedly and becoming a movie star probably don’t fit the criteria for a “realistic” action plan.)

Previous articles have offered realistic roadmaps for your success. Have you been able to stick to a plan for budgeting, spending, and saving? Investing, compounding, harvesting your rewards? “Spend less that you make.” “Have a regular savings plan.” “Buy low, sell high.”

On paper, at least, financial planning sounds easy, right? Why are so many people unable to get their financial house in order? There are more answers to that question than can be answered here, but if you still struggle with finances, you may need to start with looking at yourself and identifying some of the bumps on your road to success.

Are you telling yourself money stories that aren’t helping you?

They may involve buying rewards for yourself because “you deserve it” or spending too much money going out on the weekend because “life is short” or “spending time with friends is important.” Both sayings are, no doubt, true, but are there ways to do them honor without spending too much money? Maybe you tell yourself that buying a big, beautiful house is always a good investment. Guess what? Even a house can be just another consumer good that’s draining your bank account.

Sometimes you can’t tell your family and friends that you can’t afford to do what they’re doing. I’ll let you in on a secret: there’s a good chance they can’t afford those things either. They may be going into debt living the life “they deserve” or “they expected.” Don’t follow them down the path.

Take a hard look at what’s important to you.

Does your budget reflect your values and your goals? Or do they reflect the values of the “friends you keep.” Sarah Newcombe, a senior behavioral scientist at Morningstar, Inc., says that comparing ourselves to others is hardwired into our brains. She recommends choosing carefully whom you compare yourself with. If it’s Kim Kardashian and you realize she doesn’t really represent who you want to be, you might want to choose a new role model. A better model might be the quiet, unassuming millionaire next door who doesn’t drive a fancy car but was able to pay his kids’ college tuition without going into debt.

Decide what’s important to you, find a healthy role model who has achieved what you want to achieve, and then compare away. Newcombe says that your odds of being satisfied with your finances and life will increase with a healthy financial role model.

If you need help figuring out what you want from life and your money, contact us at South Bay Financial Partners. We can help you put the pieces of your personal puzzle together to make a beautiful picture that we call our lives. Schedule a FREE consultation with us here >> https://calendly.com/SBFP-Call